Self pity

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We all have those moments where life’s proverbial bullies gang up on us and we shrivel into a ball and feel sorry for ourselves. We become so overwhelmed with negative things that our mechanism for coping pops a few springs and lays useless at our feet.  But self pity is like a rocking chair… gives you something to do, but it really gets you nowhere.

Still, sometimes it is difficult to pull ourselves out of that funk and move into a more positive realm.  Self pity can be all-encompassing.  Once we let it into our mind, it takes root and wraps itself deeply into the soil of our emotions.  When something comes along to crush our spirit, every bad thing that follows seems to compound that helpless feeling and we begin to lose our buoyancy in a churning sea of despair.

We tend to be pessimistic and convince ourselves that more bad karma will follow, when instead we should be sending out positive thoughts to get back that affirming energy.  We need to rethink the whole picture and realize that the small obstacles that have presented themselves do not define the rest of our lives. Our emotions become exaggerated and self-indulgent, and we tend to ignore the rest of the world still revolving around us.

We need to make a pact with ourselves to not indulge in that obsessive behaviour.  Gratitude and self-pity are bitter enemies.  If we take time from our “pity party” to think about all the things we should be grateful for, eventually the affirmations of all the good in our lives will counter-balance the scales.

Every negative occurrence in our lives can be seen as an opportunity to learn from that experience.  Instead of wallowing in a mire of self-pity, step back for a moment and realize that the positive things in your life far outweigh the negative aspects.  Put an end to that pity party, get a good night’s sleep, and start the next day with a new outlook.  You’ll be amazed what a new attitude will bring.


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Denial – as the old saying goes – “It’s not just a river in Egypt”.

Denial is the most powerful weapon we have in our arsenal.  The uncanny ability to reject the truth so vehemently and insist that there is an alternate reality is the biggest defence mechanism we have.  Despite any overwhelming evidence to the contrary, we convince ourselves that the situation at hand is not as bad as others keep trying to convince us it is.

The fact of the matter is that, no matter how uncomfortable the circumstance, we are able to distort that truth and see the world through those proverbial rose-colored glasses.  Or we are able to bury our heads in the sand, hoping that when we pull ourselves out of that pit that the world around us has forgotten about the truth that we tried so hard to dissolve.

Denial gives us the ability to not cope with reality and to learn nothing from the lesson we are faced with.  We minimize the importance of the glaring truth that is staring us in the face, and we sculpt the verity in our lives to suit our purpose.

Eventually the ticking time bomb of reality will eviscerate the comforting tomb of denial.  The truth always has a way of emerging, and whether we like it or not, we will have to face the music that was always playing in the background.

Dealing with an uncomfortable situation will be just that, uncomfortable.  But the sooner we stand up to the problem, the easier it will be to find a resolution.  Denying the facts will only get you so far.  Ultimately reality will win and the effort we put into our denial will be fruitless. See things for how they really are – diffuse that ticking time bomb, live honestly and pull your head out of the sand.  Reality is not as bad as you may make it out to be, but you will never know until you confront it.

A Dog May Bark, But the Train Keeps Moving


There are sayings that have been around for centuries, and when you hear them, they may make absolutely no sense whatsoever – until you delve into the meaning behind them.

Everyone must live the life they want to lead.  Although we must all take heed of the laws that govern us, we must nonetheless march to the beat of our own drummer and do what is right for us. Our life train gains speed the more decisions we make that allow us to follow the track that we have set for ourselves.  But there are always those naysayers that will agree to disagree and never concede to our ideals.

They are the proverbial dogs that are barking at our train as it roars along on its path.  But our train will keep moving.  One small voice, or one bark, cannot change the momentum of a speeding freight train. As our locomotive barrels along its intended path, the voices of the barking dogs recede and get lost in the din of metal on metal.

Those dogs will always continue to bark as the train passes, but the strength in that one bark has no consequence on our journey.  Our train will continue to roll on and quell the growl of the hounds nipping at our heels.

The more we believe in the direction that our speeding locomotive is taking us, the quieter those barking dogs become until we cannot hear them at all.   Believe in the path you are taking.  Let that train follow on the track you have set and don’t let one small dog’s bark or one voice derail the itinerary of your life.