Category Archives: enjoying life

Ho-ho-holy crap, it’s that time of year again!

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With the holiday season rapidly encroaching on an otherwise boring fall, it brings to mind all of my favorite holiday movies.  The familiar faces and witty vernacular that are deeply ingrained in my brain will be gracing the television screens once again.  There are a select few that are must-sees for me every year – certain stories that define my holiday experience.

Holidays, for me, are about tradition and part of my tradition revolves around curling up on the couch and indulging my penchant for movies that truly capture the essence of Christmas.   Whether they are steeped in family values, or bordering on the insane, they nonetheless reflect the true meaning of what the holiday season is meant to represent.

With Christmas a mere 41 days away, I have already begun scanning the satellite channels for the first glimpse of those timeless treasures that will shape my season of festivities.  The first on the list is always A Christmas Story.  I can’t seem to help myself.  It has truly become the staple of my Christmas holidays and a custom I hope to carry into my future.  (I bought the DVD, just in case the powers-that-be decide to take it off the air)

Other classics like Elf and Christmas Vacation play their role in my holiday bliss as well and Christmas Eve would never be the same if I didn’t watch The Sound of Music with my mom.  Although it cannot be defined as a holiday movie, it is the most important tradition of my holiday season.

My tree will soon be trimmed, the lights will be twinkling in my darkened living room and the wreath will once again find its place on my door.  A variety of Santa Claus likenesses will take their assigned spots in anticipation of having a front row seat to watch the holiday classics with me.  It truly is the most wonderful time of the year.

What are your holiday “must watch” movies?

Plan B

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With the inescapable approach of winter, I have recently begun Curling again and I am really enjoying being back on the ice with a group of challenging competitors as well as amusing team mates.

Although I have been watching considerably more Curling on television (and hope to, once again, be at the live Skins game at Casino Rama), I admittedly have not acquired as much of their skill set as I had originally anticipated.  The theory of Osmosis apparently does not lend itself to learning a sport.  For having not been on the ice for 6 months, I will tell you that I am not disappointed with my level of proficiency and I can only improve from here.

With every sport, as with every aspect in life, the best laid plans do not always come to fruition.  Although my skip may call a shot that he or she believes wholeheartedly that I can make with my eyes closed, that is not always the case.  My resulting shot becomes something I affectionately refer to as “Plan B”.   It may not be the brilliant guard shot, or the double take-out that was required, but was still somewhat effective and it enables our team to look ahead to the next shot.

Every situation in life should have a Plan B.  It can make what could be a torturous event into something far less stressful.  A seamless transition into a Plan B can make the path that was originally carved much less tenuous if it takes a sudden detour. The common saying in battle is that the best defence is a good offence – and a good offence is having a backup plan.  It doesn’t even have to be a fully conscious plan, but heading into battle with foresight and the ability to react quickly and analytically will help create a diversion rather than having to throw your hands up in the air in surrender.

I am fortunate that I received that analytic ability from my father.  Life has not always been picture perfect, and has certainly thrown its share of curve balls our way, but through his guidance I have developed that ability to not dwell on the immediate situation. I don’t allow myself to wallow in the reaction of self-pity, but instead, I spring into action.  I move on to the next phase without even batting an eye, creating or following through on my Plan B.  Too many moments are spent agonizing about what has just happened instead of taking that recent experience and turning it into the potential of what can happen next.

Be prepared to handle what life throws at you, but also be willing to delineate to the road less travelled.  Having a Plan B allows you to not dwell on the past, but instead gives you the courage to step boldly into the future.

Smile

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“A smile is the curve that can set everything straight.”  ~ Phyllis Diller

Whether a smile is formed to placate another person, or the muscles are drawn upwards in a genuine feeling of pleasure, that smile sends a great deal of positive energy into the surrounding space.  It is contagious.  The small amount of effort used to contort the facial muscles required to smile is a mere drop in the bucket compared to the return on your investment.  We all live in a business world, and the bottom line, the ROI, is the quintessential pot of gold at the end of the proverbial rainbow.  But what if the corporations and the highly educated leaders at the helm of those business models are missing the most important, yet the simplest element?

An effortless expression of friendliness can break down barriers – far beyond any tangible barriers we can grasp.  A smile can lighten the mood, set the tone for a conversation and alleviate any preconceived anxiety.  A smile – something so simple that can envelop so many with the least amount of effort.

With the overwhelming number of things that can be taken as misfortunes, each facet of our lives still presents beauty, depth and a myriad of things to be able to create that smile.  Life has not always been a bouquet of roses, but standing on my deck tonight in temperatures far colder than anticipated, I looked up into a very starry night and smiled.  I smiled because I chose to live in a place that allows me to see those stars.  I smiled because, even though not every thing is perfect in my life,  I am content.  I smiled because there is so much potential for me to conquer my dreams.  And I smiled because every time I inhale and exhale, I breathe life into my life.

Smile because you are here.  Smile because every day affords you a clean slate and you can choose to do whatever you want to do.  Smile because people love you.  Whatever reason makes you feel that joy, just smile, and pass that joy on to someone else.  It is the best gift you can give.

 

There’s no place like home

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If you read my post yesterday, you’ll know I awoke out of a comfortable sleep and repeated the phrase “white rabbit” three times.  It’s an old family tradition meant to bring luck for the remaining days of that month.  I do believe we create our own luck to some extent, but there are definitely external forces, with perhaps a bit of Karma thrown in for good measure, that help propel us into those moments of good fortune.

I haven’t checked my astral projections to know if my stars were aligned yesterday (I don’t really do that), but the day was full of positive energy and the God’s seem to smile favorably upon me in many ways.  Probably the most exciting news was the possibility of writing a page for a local magazine that has a feature written by selected guest writers about the area that I am proud to call my home.  The decision will be made after the editor has decided that my writing prowess cuts the mustard, but I’m hopeful that I will pass the test.

Writing, to me, is about combining things I truly believe in with an honesty that the reader can not only relate to, but can find charm and warmth in the words that I feel strongly about putting on a page.  Writing is about bringing life and imagery to the forefront of the reader’s mind and helping them experience the same passion I feel for the subject about which I so diligently write and rewrite.

I know another blogger (and successful author) who is making the pilgrimage back to a place she truly calls home.  It is her muse and her refuge from a world that she blended into, but never could truly call her home.  I know that she will find solace in enveloping herself in the place she can genuinely feel like she is herself and that natural landscape will welcome her back with open arms.  There is no place like home.

My desire is that the panorama of my daily life and the poetry of my words will collide to create a spectral portrait and do justice to the beauty in which I am fortunate enough to spend my days and nights.  It is the song of my soul.  It is my true home.

With my writing cap on and my fingers poised above the keyboard, I will click my ruby slippers three times and forge into a tale of love for a landscape that has embedded itself into the cells of my being.  Home is where the heart is, and my heart only beats here.

Tame the drive, not the driver

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I need to put the “drive” back in my drive.   Since the tender age of 17 when I first tested the waters of being behind the wheel of a vehicle, I always had a manual transmission – it has defined my driving experience. Although it was a rocky beginning, we made our way through the rough patches and have forged a bond that is unparalleled.

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I’m not going to go beyond my comfort zone and hop into the driver’s seat of a Formula 1 race car yet (although I do know someone who has just done that and loved it!!), but I need to feel like I am in control when I am commanding the power of a vehicle, and shifting gears gives me that sense of efficacy that I lack when putting an automatic transmission into drive and mundanely steering through the back roads.  These roads are meant for driving, and to me, and others who have voiced their opinion, driving an automatic transmission is just aiming.  If you want to really know your vehicle, know how it loves to hug curves, drop from fifth gear to third to pass the chump  law abiding citizen in front of you, that manual transmission is the way to your best driving experience.

The decision to shift away from the only driving I’d ever really known was driven by my choice in vehicles.  (please note the puns in that sentence, I worked hard on those).  At the time I was ready to lease my next four-wheeled experience, I was mad for the Honda CR-V.  I loved every thing about it.  But there was one major drawback.  It only came in automatic transmission.  It was decision that weighed heavily on me, and it took every fibre of my being to make the choice to move away from seamlessly shifting those gears by just listening to the advice of my engine to pushing a stick into drive and moving the steering wheel back and forth.  It is a decision I have come to regret.

Although my lease is only at the halfway point, my go-to guy at Honda is busily looking for a buy out for my CR-V so I am able to get back into a car I can actually drive – not just a vehicle that I can steer and get myself from A to B.  I want to be on the highway again and feel that engine cry for me to shift it from fourth to fifth as those tires burn up some asphalt.

Learning how to drive a stick-shift gave me a sense of freedom that I didn’t realize I had until long after I learned how to master the smooth shifting of those gears.  I could drive any motor vehicle built to grace the pavement.  As a teen, I worked for a property maintenance company that relied on an old pick-up truck as they forged their way into a growing business in cottage country.  The truck had a manual transmission – three on the tree – and I was one of the only staff members that had a comfort level with the truck to be able to drive it.  I took great pride in the fact that I could command any vehicle that I was afforded the luxury to drive, and knowing the subtleties of that manual engine gave me a sense of power.

Never again will I make a decision based on looks and my inability to fight for what I truly want.  My ride has to challenge me.  It has to demand that I put forth the same effort as it does so we may both enjoy the ride from first to fifth.

So jump in the driver’s seat and weigh in – automatic or standard?

Children left unattended will be given an espresso and a puppy (Weekly writing challenge)

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The sign is distinct, yet tactful.  A similar sign adorns the pillars in the dining room of the family resort at which I am employed and is a subtle reminder to parents that they are responsible for their children’s behaviour or the consequences could be dire.  To my knowledge, we have never given away a puppy or offered a child a libation of the purest caffeine, but the impending threat is still felt within those walls.

The idiom “children should be seen and not heard” was a popular string of words when I was rapidly growing through my childhood.  Back in those days, and I may be slightly showing my age, we respected our parents wishes.  We didn’t put our elbows on the table during meals, we didn’t talk with our mouths full and we wouldn’t even entertain the idea of leaving the family dinner table without being excused.  Sadly, (or not, depending on how you look at it) I would have never been a candidate for the espresso or the free puppy.

I write this post with mixed emotions.

Kids learn by doing.  Experience incorporates more of a lesson than words can ever teach.  If they never have the opportunity to encounter culture and fine dining, they may never learn to be cultured or understand how to act in a situation that is far removed from the “norm”.   But parents need to know when the child is ready for that learning curve.  Kids need worldly experience, however those learning moments must be punctuated by behavioural corrections, if necessary. Tackling that battle at too young an age will only frustrate the child, as well as the surrounding crowd.  When they are at an age that they don’t fully comprehend what is expected of them, they are bound to lash out. Therein lies the rub.

Adults that wish to experience exquisite meals enhanced by vintage wines and ambiance don’t aspire to have that savoir-faire tarnished by young diners that have not had the opportunity to learn the etiquette required to frequent such an establishment.  I would not ever deny a child an opportunity to learn from such a dining experience, but perhaps there is a happy medium.

The same can be said for any cultural undertaking.  Although children need exposure to all of life’s mysteries, there needs to be a divide between the right time and the right place.  And maybe more importantly, the right attitude towards that broadening experience.  Yes, children need to learn, but not at the expense of others attempting to allow themselves that rare moment that they are able to steal precious seconds of escape from their day-to-day reality.

Give children the benefit of cultural awareness, but also of situational awareness.  They may not be able to define the lesson they are learning, but it will serve them well into their adult lives.  Take them to a fine dining restaurant.  Take them to the museum.  But take them when it is more appropriate for younger people to frequent those particular venues while they are still in the learning stages of their development.  They will still gain the much required knowledge to take forward into their teen and adult years, but they will still show the respect and allow the freedom for adults to thrive in an atmosphere that is designed for a crowd that is over a certain age.

Let the children learn in rich and vivid detail, but also let them learn the boundaries and obstacles that are held within the confines of the rules of etiquette.   There is a lesson is everything we do – and maybe dining with a toddler at Nobu at 7:00 pm is not the lesson that the pre-schooler needs to learn at that particular moment of their developmental stage.   Respect for children’s knowledge is accepted and encouraged.  Respect for an adult’s sanctuary is priceless.

Forget the door – look for the window

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I am a big fan of old musicals and one of my favorites is The Sound of Music.  There is a line in that show that has always resonated within me – “Wherever God closes a door, somewhere he opens a window”.

So many times we become obsessed with that closed door.  We torture ourselves to find the reason the door closed in the first place without even thinking that another portal may have opened for us to venture into.  We spend countless minutes and hours wondering what would have happened had that door remained open when the opportunity for a new adventure sits in plain sight with unlimited access.

Having that door close is not an ending.  Although the task of finding another threshold is daunting, we need to grasp the possibility that an alternate passageway is available to us, and we need to seize the opportunity to climb through that window. We need to view that window as a new beginning.

Doors close for a reason.  And that reason exists as much as the reason for that window to open.  Life is presented to us as a menu of choices.  You can choose to bang on that closed door until your knuckles bleed, but you can also decide that perhaps the open window is far more inviting once you realize its potential.

Moving beyond that closed door may be difficult, but if you give that open window a chance, you may find that the space beyond those broadening panes of glass may provide more of a panorama than that door ever could.  Embrace the possibility of change.  Those inviting window panes may hold the key to something you never thought possible.

See your world from a different perspective.  Sometimes we need to see our existence beyond the confines to which we have become accustomed and allow ourselves a completely different view.

Endings are really just beginnings

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After an arduous struggle, and some tenacity on my part, I started the lawnmower for, perhaps, the last time this year.  It sputtered and spewed out clouds of foul smoke while arguing incessantly for the first few minutes.  But my sheer determination overrode any attempt on its part to not rise to the task at hand.

The sweet smell of wet, fresh-cut grass mixed with the pungent odor of rotting crimson leaves made the battle very worthwhile.  Since I live on my own once again, I am the master of indoor and outdoor responsibilities.  Cutting the lawn is my favorite outdoor job.  Trimming those lengthy blades of grass is thirty minutes of pure escape.  It requires constant movement and the noise from the engine all but negates the possibility of any interruption.  And the odoriferous fragrances of fall that permeate my nose make the task that much more pleasing.  Newly shredded Oak and Maple leaves are combined with the grass to create not only a colorful spectral portrait, but a fusion of smells that is unrivaled.

With the falling of the leaves and the inevitable frost that comes most nights, I don’t look at it as an ending.  Each season brings with it new possibilities and new beauty.  Although there is a vast chasm between the rainbow of colors in October and the stark landscape through November until the snow flies, there is still an unwavering sense of peace and solitude that comes with that unending, brown panorama.

As the days grow shorter and the mercury on the thermometer fails to climb, my dog is waiting with great anticipation of the first snowfall.  Admittedly, I may not be as ready for the emergence of winter, but I do eagerly await the fresh crispness of the air and the stunning dance of the snowflakes as they playfully race to the ground.

With a hearty dose of snow-shovelling and roof raking to bide my time through the blustery winter months, my lawnmower will be tucked away, bundled up in the safe confines of my gazebo.  Get some rest, my feisty friend.  You and I will be doing battle again soon enough.

What I want to be when I grow up

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I was talking to some friends today about my blog.  They have been very supportive and encouraging, which really inspires me to continue this journey of my recently rekindled love for language.  I have always had a passion for words, but now my passion has gone from glowing embers to a roaring blaze.   One of the girls was unaware of my blog, and when she asked if I was a writer, I responded without hesitation – yes.

That was the first time in my life I have felt worthy of being able to call myself a writer and I felt an overwhelming sense of joy.  I have always responded to similar questions with varied responses.  “Oh, I write poetry” or “I’ve written a couple of short stories”, but never have I felt enough ownership of my talent to be able to claim that I am a writer.   Today was the turning point in that constant battle in my head.  I am a writer, and I’m proud to finally be able to admit that.

After years of searching for what truly makes me happy, I finally decided what I want to be when I grow up.  Okay, so I’m 43 years old, but I still feel like I have a lot of growing to do, not only as a writer, but as a person.  But I want to write.  I feel that fire coursing through my veins more and more and the urge to string sentences together into paragraphs fraught with meaning is overwhelming.  Ideas churn in my brain during the conscious hours of my day and random dreams diffuse themselves into plot lines when my eyelids flutter open to watch the new crest of the sun greet the horizon.

My dream is quickly becoming more of a reality because I am allowing myself to believe that I can achieve the possible.  Embrace what it is that truly makes you feel complete.  If you keep your dreams alive, you can still chase them.

Lazy days

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Everyone is entitled to have a lazy day every once in a while.  It recharges our batteries and gives us a much-needed to chance to store up the energy needed to face the days that follow it. Sometimes we just feel unproductive and unmotivated – and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, within reason. If your lazy days start turning into lazy weeks, you may want to rethink your strategy.

I used to have a real problem letting myself sit and do nothing. My brain always kicked into the guilt gear and I was forced to get off the couch and do all the things that were nagging at me from the back of my cranium.  I’m over that.  I am now able to embrace the feeling of not accomplishing a single thing.  There certainly are moments of boredom encompassed in that lazy day, but if I take that moment to remember the fast pace of any other day, that boredom is replaced by bliss.

The lazy day becomes about taking time for me and not stressing myself out if the laundry doesn’t get sorted or the dust accumulates for one more day.  Although today was not a completely lazy day.  After giving myself permission to actually sleep in, I did clean the house and I vacuumed the inordinate amount of dog hair from my carpet that seems to increase exponentially!!  But the rest of it was spent in a suspended state of oblivion…..and it was just what the doctor ordered.  I focused on what I needed instead of what needed to be done.

Those rest of those chores will still be beckoning for me tomorrow, but for today, the deck furniture and the couch won the argument.  Today is about my three favorite “R” activities – reading, red wine and regurgitating the countless words that whirl around in my brain. (there may be a movie thrown in for good measure)

I hope you all take the time to let yourself breathe – spend a lazy day doing the little things that make you feel human again.  And if you have any suggestions for things to do on that day of nothingness…..feel free to send along some suggestions…..I’m always looking for new ways to achieve lethargy!!