He had been standing in this exact place at least a thousand times. He could find the precise location by the position of the trees and rocks and he loved these hills for their privacy. He was always alone in this place. Wildlife took shelter when they saw him and birds would stop in mid-song when they sensed his presence. There was something unnatural about him. The animals felt it, and he knew it too. But he couldn’t stop himself. He knew eventually his tenacity would pay off.
She arrived in the late afternoon on a Tuesday. She didn’t look lost or scared and her camera hung loosely around her neck. She didn’t notice that not one creature was making a sound as she concentrated on her footing, careful not to fall in such a remote place. Had she been more aware of her surroundings, the silence would have been deafening.
She stood admiring the sun beginning its decent into the hills and took one step, two steps, inching closer to get that perfect picture. The mouth of the hole he spent hours carving opened and swallowed her into the earth. It was his moment of serendipity. His fortune, her accident.
He was pleased with himself. He would come and visit her tomorrow and he left the way he had come. The shrill song of the birds awoke her from unconsciousness and she let out a scream that nobody would hear.
~
This was written for the Trifecta challenge, which was this (and I think I have read too many Dean Koontz stories):
This week they are looking for stories or poems from 33 – 333 in length that feature the word: mouth. Not just any definition of the word will do though. Only the third definition shown below is accepted.
MOUTH
1a : the natural opening through which food passes into the body of an animal and which in vertebrates is typically bounded externally by the lips and internally by the pharynx and encloses the tongue, gums, and teeth
b : grimace <made a mouth>
c : an individual requiring food <had too many mouths to feed>
2a : voice, speech
b : mouthpiece
3: something that resembles a mouth especially in affording entrance or exit: as
a : the place where a stream enters a larger body of water
b : the surface opening of an underground cavity
c : the opening of a container
d : an opening in the side of an organ flue pipe
You can never read too many Dean Koontz stories! Terrific writing.
Thank you…and I do agree about Koontz….I LOVE him!!
You, dearest Susan, are an excellent wordsmith.
Thank you, my friend. I truly appreciate that.
…but what happens next…?????
Brilliant writing and I love Dean Dean Koontz, too
Thank you! My writing seems to mirror his strange sense of the macabre. 🙂
And we only get up to 333 words….I could go on for days!!
That’s a little disturbing.
I’m sleeping with a light on tonight.
I may have watched one too many episodes of Criminal Minds!!
I was just going to say…I’m scurred too!!!!
I can’t tell if TV rots the mind, or inspires it.
I say a little of both. 🙂 The only channel ever on my television is the ID channel. Which I’d say inspires my morbid short stories!
I’m trying to write one now for the weekly prompt that is a little more uplifting so people don’t become afraid of me. 😀
I like disturbing and scary!!! It makes me like you even more! Hahahaha 🙂
Haha….good, you’ll love my book, if I can ever get the damned thing finished!!
My book is also disturbing….and I need to finish it too!!! Let’s motivate each other!!
Great idea!! I have to start setting strict guidelines for writing the book and staying off WP!!
As do I!!!
How dementedly delightful. A story about a psychopath setting death traps in the woods. It sounds like something from out of a movie. It’s pure awesomesauce.
Thank you. My mind is a bit warped sometimes!
There’s something truly horrific about the idea of wildlife sensing evil around them. Really good.
Thank you very much.
Love this! 🙂
Thanks!
Wow. Wrong place, wrong time.
Never go into the woods alone!!
nicely done. Like the rhythm of your writing.
Thank you!
Unnatural, indeed. I’m tired of that guy mouthing off.
LOL
This reads like the prolouge to a really great thriller. Love it.
Thank you very much!
Never read a Dean Koontz but after your piece, now I kinda want to (:
Lol….I would recommend Watchers….especially if you like dogs. 🙂
That made me shiver. Well-written
Thanks very much.
Oh! Nasty!
I’m a tad bit warped. 🙂
What a psycho!Poor girl,had no inkling what was coming for her-shudder to think how he must have toyed with her before she died or got killed!Love such twists-& yes,am a Koontz (& Stephen king) fan too-just bought Koontz’s “77 Shadow street” yesterday from the Annual book fair ,in my city:-)
Yes, I’ve read his books so many times, he really got into my head! Hope you like the new book – it wasn’t one of my favorites, but still an interesting read.
Oh,I don’t know-nowadays I have no time to read anymore-my daughter picked it up-hopefully it will not disappoint her & me too,if I get to it-someday;-)
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