Admittedly, I am a creature of habit. I am predictable to a fault and I enjoy the lack of spontaneity in my routine. It is how I am comfortable and it is how I live my life. But recently I have done and said a few things that make me look at myself in the mirror and think “who are you, and what have you done with the real me?”.
As my mother used to say, I was once a girl who wouldn’t say shit if her mouth was full of it. But somewhere along the path that has carved its way through my life, thankfully I have learned to be much more vocal when it comes to standing up for myself. I used to let emotions fester under the surface, bringing themselves to a boiling point before I finally exploded from the pressure of not dealing with things as they happened. I am no longer that person.
I’m not sure if I have slowly developed an unseen confidence over the years or if I am simply sick of feeling like my opinions don’t matter. Whatever the reason, I truly appreciate my newly found voice. Perhaps it is a wisdom that really does come with age. Or maybe there comes a time in everyone’s life that you just realize the stress of keeping things to yourself just isn’t worth it.
Whatever the reason, I’m going to hang on to this new part of me and let it free the old me who was afraid to speak up. It may take a while to expunge the record of my reticence, but I’m willing to do it one comment at a time!