Tag Archives: fireflies

The fireflies at the windows

6 Comments

We are rapidly approaching the last of the “firsts” since we lost my mom almost a year ago.  I stumbled blindly through my birthday last year, which was three weeks to the day after she passed.  We muddled through the rest of the birthdays in our immediate family, except for one still to come, and celebrated mom’s birthday by having her celebration of life on that same day.

Valentine’s Day will be a quiet one for me this year.  After my dad died, mom and I made a pact to be each others Valentine.  Even after I was married, mom and I had a standing ‘date night’ on February 14th because my now ex-husband always had to work at the restaurant.  She and I would go out for a nice dinner and always gave each other either a lovely arrangement of flowers or a cry-inducing Hallmark card full of sentiment that we both honestly meant.

My youngest nephews’ 12th birthday will be the last of the firsts.  That will be an odd feeling.  But it got me thinking about all of the other milestones, the new ‘firsts’, my parents may see from where they are, but will not be able to physically participate in.  This is the calendar year that my brother will turn fifty.  I’m sure nobody in our family ever thought that momentous day would come and neither of our parents will be here to help him celebrate and embarrass him with untold stories of his youth.

They will miss my oldest nephew, in just over a year, getting his G-1 (the Canadian version of the Learner’s Permit) and creating a new crop of grey hair on the heads of my brother and sister-in-law.  They will miss both of their grandchildren deciding on what field of study they wish to pursue and their subsequent University years and future careers.  And they will not be here if the Gods decide to shine favorably and allow me to fall in love again, the right way this time with the person who deserves my heart.  (although I know my mom will be doing her best to send that person my way)

fireflies

I know in my heart that both of my parents wouldn’t miss any of these events.  They will be those dancing specks of light we see at dusk, hovering by the window to watch our lives move forward.  It would just be so much nicer if they were standing right beside us to share in all of the new firsts yet to come.

 

 

 

 

 

In the still of the night

7 Comments

Tonight, in Mother Nature’s fury,  we were graced by another storm exemplified by strong winds, rain, thunder and lightning.  Living in a rural area means we are well accustomed to living without power during these tumultuous acts of divine intervention.  The plethora of trees bend to the power that nature possesses and ultimately the lines of power created by man are no match for the Goddess of weather.  We have been plunged into darkness and are submerged in the sounds of silence.

The world, as we know it, has come to a grinding halt and we are left bathed in the ethereal glow of candlelight.  The earth has been baptised by the rain and the creatures of the night have true reign over their territory.  Man cannot disturb what it cannot see.

I enjoy these moments.  These nights that I am cloaked in darkness allow me the time to truly shut out the world.  I have no cause to watch mindless television or surf the web in search of something to idly entertain my brain.  I am left with my thoughts, transcribed in dim light by pen to paper, and a sense of relaxation that can only come from having no outward distractions to blame for my laziness.  This is true escape.

My world, apart from two small candles, is black.  The stillness of the night soothes my soul and the quiet envelops me like a blanket.  I pull myself into it, feel the comfort of its solitude and soak in the warmth of its bliss.  The creatures that sing their haunting refrains lull me into a trance.  Pin-pricks of light dappled the sky as Fire Flies dance on the velvet backdrop of their own Black Light Theatre.  The night is beautiful.

fireflies

(image credit: globeattractions.com)

Sitting in my darkened tomb I know, as all good things do, this moment of bliss will come to an end.  Power will be restored and the world will be bathed in harsh light and modern reality.  Thankfully the world I live in, so far removed from city life, can remain this dark if I wish to keep the outside world extinguished.  Even when the power is restored I can live in my alternate reality by leaving the lights off, enjoying the speckled light show outside my window and embracing the still of the night.