Monthly Archives: January 2013

Things that have been seen, cannot be unseen

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Social-Media-Marketing

Social media has been at the forefront of our communication for a while.   Perhaps I have just recently noticed, or perhaps I was blind to it before, but it seems the more social media is used now, the more it becomes misused.  I’ll admit I used to enjoy Facebook, but it has become less of an interest the more my eyes became privy to far too many personal issues being aired on the internet.

I am not, by any means, being hypocritical as I too have used this blog to vent some frustrations, but there are limits to what I will spew out into cyber space.  The rules of social conduct still guide my brain and do not allow me to cross the line of over-sharing information or being unjustifiably vindictive.

Before the ever-changing Facebook screen began to fade from my daily ritual,  I was one of hundreds to have my news feed littered with vulgarities and horribly personal comments as two people ended their relationship in a way that truly resembled most reality shows.  It was like watching a train wreck in slow motion – some of the things that were said back and forth were ruthless and unnecessary, but the two involved somehow felt it appropriate for those things to be shared with all of us.

It was an easy decision for me to avoid the written daggers that were being thrown with the force of an Olympian because I have no personal stake in whether that relationship thrives or dies a horrible death.  But words on the internet penetrate millions of eyes, and sadly, four of those eyes more than likely belong to her two children.  I know they have their own Facebook accounts and, unless the power of the magic eraser cleansed those Facebook walls before they saw them, they will have experienced something that never should have been aired in such a public forum in the first place.

I still use my Facebook account infrequently, as it is still a place that I can share this blog with my friends.  But that uncomfortable public display of a  genuinely personal issue made me rethink how much information and the nature of that material I am willing to share.

The first of (hopefully) many milestones.

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When I started this blog, I really had no idea where my voice would take me, if anywhere.  I had no idea that I would connect with people on a level far deeper than sharing a passion for writing.  I have met some extremely funny and wickedly intelligent people who I feel a greater bond with, far beyond that of just fellow writers.

My blog has taken a shape that reflects a lot of who I am.  It is generally written the way I see things – through images, metaphors and feelings. Since August of last year, I have been pretty diligent about posting every day and I am amazed that the ideas for posts keep seeping into my brain.  The ideas may take the form of stories, poetry or photographs, but that is the joy in blogging about profundities ~ every forum can portray something interesting to someone.

Today I am proud to say I’ve reached the 10,000 hit mark.  A big thank you to all of you who stop by on a regular or even an infrequent basis.  I’m glad the things I have to say and the way I say them are engaging enough to make you keep popping in for a visit.  Call ahead next time and I’ll be sure to have the Hazelnut Vanilla coffee freshly brewed in anticipation of your arrival.

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WOO HOO!!

Here’s hoping that inspiration, imagination and humor keep meeting for coffee on a regular basis in the Starbuck’s in my brain……and here’s hoping for another 10,000 hits!!

Take a walk in my shoes

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Judge me not by what you see of my first appearance.  Do not drink in the sight of me without first appreciating the ingredients that were combined to create the final product.  Although by outward appearance you think you may know me, know what I’m made of, but the recipe for this product is the result of a myriad of ingredients.

Before you judge me, put on my shoes and walk through my past.  See what it is that has shaped me and made me the person I am today.  Wear those shoes and glimpse into the experiences that have carved out the life I have led.  Hold fast in those shoes while the toes point precariously over dark chasms and walk freely in them as they guide you out of harms way.

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Skip happily through my successes, but always be prepared at a moment’s notice to plant those shoes firmly in defiance of those who wished to take advantage.  There is knowledge and power in those shoes.  They hold the key to my existence.  They have led me to triumph and helped me run from despair.

So before you make up your mind about me, take a walk in my shoes.  Watch my journey unfold, and only after you have glimpsed the many facets of reality that have made up my life, only then may you cast your judgement.

How long do I have before the commerical cuts me off?

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My new friend TwinDaddy over at Stuph Blog has nominated me for the Liebster Blog Award – thank you for that!!  And be sure to check out his site – the guy is seriously funny!!  (and potentially doesn’t love oxymorons as much as I do!!)

The idea is to tell 11 things about yourself (super, nothing like revealing things well hidden), answer 11 questions posed by the person that nominated you (even worse, considering his sense of humor) and nominate other bloggers for the award.

So….some things about me, in no particular order (and don’t count, I will be short of eleven) – I would not survive a day without the aromatic scent and sensual taste of Hazelnut Vanilla coffee.  I would feel like I had lost an appendage if something happened to my dog.  I still have the Winnie The Pooh my mom gave me for my first birthday.  In 2011, I lost 50 pounds and have been able to keep it off.  My dream job was to be a journalist.  I’m going to finish my novel if it kills me.

His questions are as follows:

1) If you could live on any planet in that galaxy far, far away, which would it be?  After a very brief bit of research, and I’m talking 5 minutes, I would choose Tatooine for two reasons.  It slightly resembles my nickname (Tooie) and the name roughly translates into “the eyes”, and eyes never lie.

2) What is your favorite flavor Hot Pocket?  Channing Tatum in tight jeans…..or did I misunderstand the question?

3) What does an ideal day consist of for you? I wake up to the smile of my dog, drink an over-abundance of coffee, try to keep my hands from trembling from caffeine overdose, make it through my day job so I can come home and read the brilliant posts by my fellow bloggers, and I write.  Oh, and I curl two nights a week and love it.

4) You find the Stormtrooper armor sexy, don’t you?   It has permeated my dreams and I’m currently seeking therapy.

5) Kirk or Picard?  I just…..can’t…….answer……..that……….question……without……. thinking…………of……..Kirk.  (come on, if you ever watched it, you know that’s what he sounded like)

6) If I were to say, “Watch out, hot buns coming through!”, which type of buns would I be referring to?  The first thing that comes to mind is Princess Leia and the ridiculous “hair buns” on her head.  You love her, I know you do.  She makes your light saber twitch.

7) Who is your favorite comic book character?  I loved Betty from the Archie comics.  She was the girl that everyone could hang out with and she wasn’t obsessed with her looks.

8) What’s the worst movie you’ve ever seen? There are several that I couldn’t watch to the end, and generally I give movies the benefit of the doubt and hope they get better.  Apparently I’ve blocked out the names of the truly horrible….

9) Android, iPhone or Windows Phone? I’m having a relationship with my iPhone….is that wrong?

10) What the hell did you do that for?   I thought you said it would change my life…..foiled again!!

11) Why do you keep coming back to torment yourself with my inane writings?  Is inane a synonym for brilliant or hysterical?  ‘Cause if it is….that is a stupid question.

So….now to nominate other “dear” bloggers (Liebster means dearest in German) for this fun award.  I have no drumroll…..fail.

Change for a Year

Sethsnap

Girl of The Corn

Homesick and Heartstruck

Cobbled Toolbox 

A Word in Your Ear

All of these people write from the heart and/or share the dearest part of their lives through their photography.

Now….11 questions for them to ponder for a while.

1) What is the most important lesson you’ve learned in your life?

2) Who inspires you the most?

3) How would you share your talent if you couldn’t blog?

4) Do you think you can make genuine friends over the internet, even if you never meet face to face?

5) What is your favorite line from a novel or poem, and why?

6) If you could be a professional athlete, what sport would you choose?

7) How often do you curse?

8) Have you ever clicked “like” on a blog without actually reading the whole thing?

9) If you had to choose between only ever having television or music, which would you choose?

10) Do you regret anything you’ve done in your life, and would you go back to change it?

11) Do you believe in reincarnation?

Phew…..that was very taxing on my poor over-worked brain.  Now to relax with a glass of wine and try to get creative once again!!

He just didn’t get it

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Each Romantic Monday I find my brain reflecting on past romances I have had in my life.  I fondly remember what was so beautiful about them, and I sadly recall the things that could have been so much better.

When I am in love, the object of my affection is well aware of my feelings.   I am very demonstrative with subtle touches and knowing looks, I am very generous with my words of love and support and I strive to achieve the element of surprise when it comes to giving little tokens to simply make that other person smile.

rose

For some reason, on my drive to work this morning I dredged up a past relationship that had been pronounced dead long before its time.  After many attempts to perform CPR on the lifeless romance, it flat-lined and I had to call it.  I walked away knowing I had done all I could to save it and scrubbed my hands of the regret.

But that premature death still bothers me, because he just didn’t get it.   I would leave cards or poems on his dashboard just to make him smile.  What I thought was keeping us close, inevitably drove a wedge between us and the diseased cells began to form.  He was unable to appreciate the gifts I gave because they made him feel guilty for not buying me gifts or leaving cards where I would find them hours later.  What he failed to realize, is the only thing I wanted in return was his love.  I didn’t expect him to mirror my efforts, but I did expect him to understand that those displays and those gifts were me.  And if he couldn’t accept those, he couldn’t accept me.  Time of death – 8:00 pm on a Tuesday long ago.

I still visit the shallow grave of that romance on occasion.  I used to leave flowers on the tombstone, but I have since realized they will never be appreciated.

Spending the Night

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A poem written for Romantic Monday ~ thank you again, EH, for the inspiration.

As dusk envelops the clear blue sky, and stars begin to shine,

The pale moon glow and the black of night, give heed to the ebb of time.

A sense of urgency, a passionate kiss, lead inhibitions to take flight,

Our eyes are locked, I’m in your arms and I’m eager to spend the night.

 The lights grow dim, the air is electric, you take me by the hand,

Without a word I follow, mind and body understand.

My heart beats rapidly as I begin to feel your hot breath close to my ear,

My legs weaken, I fall to the bed, I draw you to be near.

Bodies intertwine under a blanket of heat and the dusk gives way to dark,

Passion churns and hunger flames, causing energies to spark.

The sense of desire, the animal need, the cries of pleasure and pain,

The intensity ends, we lay spent, I’m cloaked in your arms once again.

As I fall into sleep full of dreams and desire, I feel you close to my skin,

Your breathing is heavy, your mind is at rest, and a contented feeling is within.

The night quickly passes to the breaking of dawn and together we welcome the day,

I awake in your arms, to the warmth of your kiss, and it’s there I want to stay.

sleepy-logo

Smile and the world smiles with you

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Nobody remembers the specifics of my entrance into the world, much like they don’t recall how I got my nickname, but they do remember that I was abundantly happy at an age when babies do nothing more than cry and sleep.  I was not the baby who would play strange and scream if a stranger picked me up, there was no colic, no fuss, just smiles.  My mother used to wake me up at 11:00 at night just so she could play with me because I was such a happy toddler.   Her friends thought she was certifiable until she invited them over to prove a point.  I became a real hit at parties!

smiling-baby-with-toys

(not actually me, but the resemblance is uncanny)

I am fortunate to have carried that disposition with me throughout my life.  I am rarely in a bad mood.  And although my mother doesn’t come over at 11:00 pm to play with me anymore, I wake up in the morning, smiling and just, happy.

I am the person in the room that will make a ridiculous statement so I can make even one person smile.  On the curling ice, I’m the comedian who invented full-contact curling. I don’t use it very often, but the thought of me turning into a Defensive Tackle on the ice amuses people and makes the game more fun.  One of my teammates told me he didn’t think I have an angry bone in my body.  (He hasn’t seen me dealing with an aggressive hotel guest hell-bent on proving they are right, when, against the premise of the rules of customer service, I vehemently disagree.)

I am lucky that I am able to find the joy in the small things in my life.  Music lifts my spirit – when I am alone, I sing like I’m on stage, I dance in my kitchen just because it’s fun and I am content to just feel light and joyous.  Even writing this post, I am smiling because I am still able to not dwell on the negative and appreciate the precious things in my life.

Smile and the world really does smile with you.

A closed mouth gathers no foot

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Blessed are those with the gift of discretion – those select members of society who have the foresight to think before they utter their thoughts aloud.  They carefully create the vision of syllables tumbling from their mouths in perfect synchronicity and follow through with eloquence and grace on their delivery.  Their words are distinct and, most often, fraught with meaning.  Their sentences have symmetry and structure and have been scrutinized at great length before being uttered.  They leave no opportunity to say the wrong thing.  In short – they think before they speak.

Because nature dictates balance in all things, there are also those who throw caution to the wind.  They randomly spew the first words that enter their brain without giving them the benefit of being filtered through the proper sieve of political or even conventional correctness.  The words are out there, hanging in the air like the particles of moisture in a dense fog.  They become thick and difficult to navigate without inevitably crashing into an invisible concrete barrier.  When the burning heat of embarrassment burns away the remnants of that fog, the orator stands alone with one foot firmly implanted in their mouth.

foot-in-mouth

Having the wisdom to compose a thought before it is cast out to the point of no return is the key to not having the bitter aftertaste of ten-year old running shoes saturating your taste buds.  Formulating a response with deliberation ensures that you are clear in what you want to say without being hurtful, cynical or idiotic.  Knowing when to step back and think before you speak gives you an opportunity to sound thoughtful and articulate, without the aftermath of explanations and backtracking.

Unless you have a foot fetish, keep in mind that words are more appreciated when sentences are given a moment to take their proper form.  Knowing what you want to say is decided in a second.  Being able to control the outpouring of emotion and present those ideas properly is worth the extra ten seconds to avoid the taste of Nike mouthwash.