A long and bumpy road

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Posted on April 7, 2013

I haven’t been able to spend much time with my words for the last few days. My mom went into the hospital on Thursday morning and I have been spending all of my days with her. She is quite sick and we’re not sure where we go from here.

It’s a helpless feeling watching someone lie in a hospital bed, looking so frail, and knowing that I can do nothing but sit and keep her company. I have done a bit of reading, but more than anything I watch her sleep. In her current world of tubes and medications, she dreams a lot and talks in her sleep. I lean forward and strain to hear what she is saying, but nothing she says is very intelligible. I’d like to think that somewhere in the haze of her drug induced suspension of consciousness that my father is whispering in her ear from his place beyond our world and keeping her company as she sleeps.

Almost as much as I miss my writing, I miss reading all of your words. Our family has a long and bumpy road ahead, but I hope I can find some time to distract myself from reality and lose myself in the happy land of WordPress.

I am on my way back to pass my day entombed by the drab walls of the hospital and listen to the beeps and hisses of the monitors. My words still churn in my head, but now they form prayers for my mom.

Find your wings

16 Comments

Posted on April 4, 2013

I had a completely different post planned for today, but after talking to a friend that I haven’t seen in a while, my whole mindset changed.

(image credit: photo-dictionary.com)

I believe we all begin our journey of life with a full set of wings. I’m not talking about Angel wings, but invisible pinions that give us a chance to rise above ourselves and discover new horizons. Somewhere along our path, our wings may be clipped. They may mutate from their original form and, although we still embody the same freedom of originality, our chance to soar becomes stifled and we miss some of that ability for latitude.

Life can be a daunting journey, fraught with challenges and roadblocks, but those feathered appendages help us maneuver beyond those obstacles with little effort. They give us room for movement that may not otherwise be possible allowing us a chance for an alternate illusion.

Our mere existence on this planet can be described as a roller coaster, a flurry of adventure and blurry images that stream through our line of sight at Mach 4. Somewhere in the blistering speed of that coach car we miss the visions we should be focusing on and get lost in the overwhelming barrage of outside interference. We are inundated with life. We become a victim of its vicious nature and forget to allow ourselves the power to fly because we become saturated with apprehension and doubt.

If you allow it, life will over-stimulate your senses and it will swallow you whole. It will envelop you and wrap your waking moments, keeping you mummified until you surrender your power at the end of a tumultuous and exhausting day.

Find your wings. Give yourself permission to feel that freedom again and take your life back. If the path you are on does not feel like the path you chose – fly. Rise high above it and give yourself a new perspective of your life. You may find that you still had those wings all along but you just forgot how to use them.

Hard pressed to share – Trifecta post

30 Comments

Posted on April 3, 2013

Divorce existed in their near future. Her words still hung heavily in the air and pummeled his eardrums with the weight of their meaning. It had finally been uttered aloud and it was no longer an idle threat that they were reaching the demise of their relationship. The reality suffocated him. His gambling had driven a wedge between them and he refused to get help for a problem he didn’t think defined him.

As he entered the casino, the familiar sound of bells and machines soothed him. He was home. He had never felt more at ease than he did in this concrete tomb of cacophony. Each of the dealers knew him by name but he only took that to be a sign of professionalism and not a reflection of addiction. The Craps table beckoned and he succumbed to its welcoming embrace.

The dice were magical. His fours ‘hard-ways’ hit over and over and the stack of chips increased exponentially in front of him. New rollers took their place and his stack continued to grow. Luck was certainly being a lady tonight. After what must have been hours he asked dealer to color him up, he collected his chips and cashed them in.

He was given the high-roller suite and stood on the balcony with the wad of bills. He didn’t want the cashier to tell him how much he had won when he cashed out. The wind tousled his hair and in one swift movement he cast the money over the edge of the balcony. The rain of bills spread swiftly through the air and littered the ground below. The crowd preparing to enter the casino pecked at the bills like chickens at their feed.

She may have taken half of his life, but she wasn’t getting half of his winnings.

Written for the Trifecta challenge (and the photo was taken on my one and only cruise – I didn’t win the money, but my friend did!)

On to this week’s one-word prompt which, this week, is inspired by the recent arrival of the Hong Kong monsoons and the start of April in general.rain (transitive verb)
1: to pour down
2: to give or administer abundantly <rained blows on his head>

3: to take a lot of money in bill form and toss it up in the air. This is most effectively done at a strip club for the effect of raining one dollar bills on the dancers (and it makes them feel so pretty), or to snub a hater by throwing money into their face that then falls to the floor like rain (use this when paying a debt to a punk bitch who keeps asking for their money to the point that they are ruining your friendship or when dumping someone who has been bankrolling you for a while now that you’re making money).

Please remember:

Your response must be between 33 and 333 words.
You must use the 3rd definition of the given word in your post.
The word itself needs to be included in your response.
You may not use a variation of the word; it needs to be exactly as stated above.
Only one entry per writer.
If your post doesn’t meet our requirements, please leave your link in the comments section, not in the linkz.
Trifecta is open to everyone. Please join us.

Good luck!

I’m not sure if I’d call it a possession…Daily Prompt

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Posted on April 2, 2013

The Daily Prompt lured me in again with its devious, thought-provoking challenge – Prized Possession: Describe an item you were incredibly attached to as a child. What became of it?

For all intents and purposes, it wasn’t actually mine. It was tangible and readily accessible when I summoned up the courage to play games with it, but I had no ownership of it. I couldn’t play with it on a whim because I had little to no control over the time I would get to spend with it. Whatever time I did get to spend with it made me love it even more.

It had many different features and helped me develop a true sense of competition. It had a hard-outer shell, but once you worked it in a little bit, it became much softer and more pliable. At certain points in my life, I actually tried to emulate this item.

I have never lost my attachment to it. If anything that attachment has only grown stronger over the years. I never had to think back and wonder what became of it because it is still near and dear to my heart. It resides five minutes from my house in a house all its own. I still play games with it, like the old days, but the games are different now.

This prized possession, the item I am still so attached to is the father of my two nephews, my brother and one of my best friends.

The well has run dry

26 Comments

Posted on April 1, 2013

(image credit: gamertherapist.com)

I have been writing this blog since August 1st and in that time I have had, it seems, quite a bit to say. But lately I find myself running out of steam when it comes to the verbosity I have enjoyed and I am struggling for ideas to write about. The well of idioms has run dry.

I have really cherished the hours spent putting my thoughts into written form and receiving feedback from all of you that are faithful readers, those who have become friends and those that happen by every now and then. It is with a bit of a heavy heart that I have decided to no longer continue this journey. With the busy season fast approaching at work, I don’t want to put mediocre words to a page just to fill a space.

If the urge strikes me to write, I may put something on Facebook every now and then, but the challenge of coming up with ideas is becoming a little too much. Thank you all for following me through this journey and I want to leave you with one last thought from the creative vault:

April Fool’s.

See you tomorrow!!

Hoarding gives me the Heebie-jeebies

10 Comments

Posted on March 31, 2013

The Daily Prompt asks this question today:

Does a messy home (or office) make you anxious and cranky, or is cleaning something you just do before company comes over?

(image credit: accentondesign.net)

The items on my coffee table do not have to be positioned at precise angles at varying degrees, but things do have a certain place in my house. I am not fanatical about cleaning, but I am stringent about being organized. I don’t get many surprise visitors because I live in a very rural area, but if people drove off the beaten path and arrived at my home, I would not be frantically searching for the Swiffer or tossing newspapers or wrappers under the couch cushions.

The same goes for my desk at work. Sure there are piles of paper and file folders, but they are organized piles that I strategically am able to work through because everything has its place.

Having said that, the entrance way into my house could potentially negate anything I’ve mentioned about seeming organized, but that will be rectified soon. My entrance way is the only spot for me to store my patio cushions and other outdoor items that are longing to be freed from their winter incarceration. It’s nothing close to being a Hoarder’s episode, but it does make me a bit anxious when I see everything piled in one spot. Hazmat suits are not required, but until I win the lottery I will have to deal with the negative aspects of living in a house that is only 650 square feet. At least the rest of it is organized!

Here is what some others had to say:

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I’d do whatever it takes – Trifextra Post

37 Comments

Posted on March 30, 2013

The treatments were grueling. Her body was showing the signs. My support was unending, but I don’t think she realized that. I shaved my head the next morning. Actions speak louder than words.

Trifextra: Week Sixty-One

This weekend we’re asking for exactly 33 words including an idiom somewhere within. Examples of idioms include – add fuel to the fire or wear your heart on your sleeve. You can find more examples and a definition of idiom here. Good luck!

Pieces of Me

8 Comments

Posted on March 29, 2013

Taking the day off yesterday was just what the doctor ordered. I had put my faith in Mother Nature to provide some sun for my entertainment, but she must have been busy shining elsewhere. Left to my own devices, I decided to delve into the creative aspects of my life that I have shelved for too many years. Writing is a cathartic and brilliant way to release the thoughts in my head, but getting back into a tactile artistic passion that seems to have been forgotten was a great way to spend the afternoon.

I used to love calligraphy when I was in high school and I was always doing one form of craft or another, so a cloudy afternoon was spent indoors with some paint, some brushes and a piece of wood. I had been trying for a while to set aside some time to create a new sign for the end of my driveway and yesterday inspiration struck and creativity flowed. This is the beginning of the sign that I hope to finish today.

In getting back into the crafty aspect of myself, I found a piece of me that had been missing. I began to realize how many of those small enjoyments I have been ignoring over the years because I was letting work and the needs of others take priority. I vowed to myself that I will start to put my needs first and make time to do the things that I enjoy. I only get to live this life once and I don’t want to look back with regret wondering why I let my life pass me by and I didn’t participate as much as I could. I don’t want to be on the sidelines doing things for other people and not be in the game.

Today is a beautiful, sunny day and I will be on my deck wrapped in a warm sweater with a paint brush in my hand. Today I’m back in the game.

Another trip around the sun

40 Comments

Posted on March 28, 2013

Today is an important day in my life…..today I am acutely aware of the number of years I have been on this ever revolving planet. A birthday is not a number to me, but a moment to celebrate the day I entered this life. (and it’s 44, but I still feel 29 so that counts, right?…..right?)

I celebrate with many people, some I know well, some I’ve never met, but there is one important celebration that mirrors mine – my Winnie The Pooh. My mom created a stuffed version of the beloved character for me when I turned one and, to this day, I still have that somewhat tattered foam-filled creature. McCall’s created a Disney series of patterns in the 1960’s that she duplicated for my brother for his first birthday and again, almost four years later, for my birthday.

He has seen his share of joys and tragedies. He has undergone facial reconstruction and some botched plastic surgery (thanks to an over-excitable Labrador Retriever that belonged to a roommate) but he still never fails to hang in there to share year after year with me. He and I have weathered many successes and many ominous periods together, but he still remains the same source of comfort he has always been.

Although it may seem somewhat childish to hang onto a toy that I have long outgrown, Winnie still holds an immeasurable value in my life. He represents a part of my childhood that I hold dear and he continues to represent the faith that I hold in my friendships. He and I may not be able to communicate on the level that is deemed normal for friends but I still feel comfortable confiding in him, knowing that he will always be there to listen when I need him.

Happy birthday Winnie…..may we continue on our journey and have a very long life together!!

Good deeds do not go unnoticed

15 Comments

Posted on March 27, 2013

The slight shimmer of light caught her eye. She slowed her pace and bent down to get a closer look at the small item that was reflecting the sunlight. The square brown patch in the slush was embossed with gold initials on the corner. She swept the snow from around the edges and picked up the water-logged wallet. It was thick and seemed to be bulging with a collection of colorful bills. She opened the fold of the wallet to a rainbow of Canadian money starting from twenties and ending with thousand dollar bills. The discovery shocked her and she quickly put the wallet in her purse before anyone noticed what she had unearthed.

(image credit: centromotel.com)

With her head down she made her way through the crowd on the sidewalk and into her office. She sat quietly in her cubicle, turning the wallet over in her hands and battling with the angel and the demon on her opposite shoulders. They were both full of very strong opinions regarding her discovery and made no qualms about sharing their thoughts. She listened intently to both arguments before making her judgement.

Her boss understood her need to leave the office briefly and after struggling to get back into her winter coat, she made her way to the local police station to report her find. The officer logged her information and got her hopes up slightly by telling her if the wallet was not claimed within thirty days, the contents would belong to her. She left the station with her head held high, knowing she had done the right thing.

A week later she received a call from the police station asking her to come in as soon as possible. She arrived and was handed an envelope. The lucky circumstance of finding the wallet and turning it in resulted in a reward of five thousand dollars. The angel on her shoulder simply smiled and nodded.

This post was written for the weekly Trifecta Challenge:

On to the weekly prompt. Pay attention to the third definition, as always. Good lucky!

LUCKY (adjective)

1: having good luck
2: happening by chance : fortuitous
3: producing or resulting in good by chance : favorable