A good reminder that it is not necessary to go full speed all the time.
I am not here to just put my toes in the water.
I am here to cannonball off a spring-board,
fully plunging into the deep end.
I am not here to simply smell the flowers.
I am here to roll through the meadow,
to give in to careless abandon,
and to saturate myself in their fragrance.
I am not here to be a guest in my own life.
I am here to live purposely,
to breathe deeply the essence of this life,
because I know, all too well, that life is short.
And at the end of my journey through this lifetime,
all of the things I did,
and all of the life I inhaled,
will hopefully served to remind me,
that I lived a deliberate life and that I made a difference.
Only yesterday that water seemed to soothe my sadness as it tickled my knees. I stood amidst nature, holding you close in my memory and in my heart. Your ashes soared high on the very breeze that used to carry our laughter.
“We are not the same persons this year as last; nor are those we love. It is a happy chance if we, changing, continue to love the changed person.” ~ W. Somerset Maugham
I love stories of couples who have been together for decades, who celebrate year after year together and still maintain that bond of love and friendship. My grandparents had it, my parents had it and my brother has it. I have not been able to weather that change with as much success as they have but that truth does not make me sad.
The most basic definition of change is to make something different. That is how the dictionary categorizes change and I have been through many circumstances in my life that have caused me to become different. Sadly, or perhaps not, I was unable to continue relationships with certain loves because I became a changed person. I had grown from experience, I had aged from knowledge and I had matured from the lessons of my reality.
I am, decidedly, not the same person this year as last. There is an underlying intensity to me that I had never previously possessed. There is a confidence, a slow-burning belief in myself, that is gradually being fueled by the understanding of my recently discovered strengths. And that person did not exist while I was in those past relationships. That person slowly transformed from chrysalis to butterfly, evolved from the person I used to be, and changed into the person I am now.
Certainly it would be a happy coincidence if we are fortunate enough to mature together and to be able to love that changed person in our lives and grow in the same direction. But it would no fault of either person if that change took different trajectories.
People change. Ideals change. Love changes. Our job is to decide whether we, being the person we are now, are still able to love that changed person or whether we need to make a change for ourselves.
In the wee hours of the morning,
her visits often happen then,
the charge in the air is palpable
and sleep is still in my head.
Her message hangs heavily in the air,
the words are always the same.
“Two kisses I will give you,
to help get you through your day.
One kiss is to give you courage,
to help you save the world.
The other kiss is to help protect you
from the curve balls that life will hurl”.
Her words soothe me and give me peace
in the last moments of my sleep.
And on my cheeks, as I face the world,
two kisses I shall keep.
(image credit: santabanta)
This was originally posted in 2014, but I swear I could feel them on my cheeks this morning.
Being a Classic Tramp was beneath the level he had hoped to achieve but, as he sat alone by the casket after the ceremony had ended, Bobo realized his frown was perfectly placed today. Soft strains of a cello played in his head as he paid his respects to Bubbles in silence.
timid at first, playful.
His eyes held a merriment,
his laughter concealed a deeper emotion.
Fleeting moments of stolen glances,
subtle traces of a finger on bare skin.
evolved from an innocent beginning,
holding an unspoken desire.
His eyes burned into hers.
Currents of electricity,
Lips graze, sparks fly,
accepting a shared yearning.
Moments of complete breathlessness,
hearts skipping a beat,
sustaining warmth in memories,
torn between desire and reality.
The Gods of fate dealt the cards,
river pushing against the tides.
pulled apart by the current,
sailing around the world,
hoping the movement of the ocean
will make them collide once again.