Cool Hand Luke – so cool, and so right. Good communication is the cornerstone to any relationship. Whether it be a work situation or an intimate kinship, the ability to be able to convey an idea through honest and open dialogue is the key to any successful alliance.
(image credit: 123rf.com)
Most human beings like to avoid conflict as much as possible. The thought of an open discussion, face to face, with the person you need to deal with is unbearable. We tend to alleviate the anxiety of that topic by discussing it with a multitude of other people rather than facing the dragon head on. But we fail to realize we are only delaying the inevitable and that myriad of other people we share our dilemma with will only add fuel to the original fire, giving it the potential to burn uncontrollably.
Life could be so much less complicated if we always had the nerve to face our problems head on and communicate our issues with the person that is at the root of our predicament. I have been guilty of avoiding confrontation myself but the end result was always exponentially worse because I was not dealing with the quandary first hand and I let outside influences sway my judgement.
I have made a much more conscious effort to communicate my thoughts and deal directly with situations before they spiral out of control. Sure, summoning the courage to take the first step is difficult but ultimately clearing the air at the very beginning of the conflict will allow you to breathe easier in the long run. The conflict can be easily resolved if it’s not allowed to take on a life of its own and the weight of the problem that sits on your shoulders is assuaged.
I am slowly building the courage to face my demons directly and not allow other voices to be my own. Only I can have the most honest discussion about the issue that I am faced with and I am learning to have faith in my ability to communicate. One honest voice is louder than a crowd.
What do you do when faced with a situation that requires confrontation?
polysyllabic profundities 
I like to do the confrtontation and get it over with as quickly as possible, so I jump right in. Sometimes that works. Sometimes I try to jump in and realize that I need to calm down first so I can bring a more level head to the situation, and so I have to step back for a bit and then come back to the confrontation.
I agree. It usually takes me a few minutes, or hours, to get the nerve to begin the process, so those necessary breaths are taken.
Postponing the inevitable is like not taking care of a wound; the longer it festers the worse it gets. And what might have begun as a minor scrape turns into a wound that is too deep to heal. As much as it may sting at first, it’s easier to deal with before you need a colonoscopy.
Hmmm….invasive yet completely uncomfortable. **Note to self – deal with conflict immediately to avoid anal probe.
Hahaha! Always a good rule of… uh, thumb… 😉
Lol….well done!! 🙂
If the confrontation is unavoidable, I try and figure out the core of the problem, then jump in.
Like you say, it probably won’t get any better if it’s ignored…
It’s certainly a learning process….I used to tuck and run and let it build up. I’m getting much better at not letting it fester.
That’s good. In the end, the extra effort of not dealing with it isn’t worth the trouble.
And I spend much less time over-analyzing what usually turns out to have a very simple remedy.
I used to be really quiet and hated confrontation. But I know now that saying what you think at the time is far better than stewing over it for years. I wish I’d known this when I was younger! 😉
Me too! It would have saved a great deal of stress and needless negative feelings.
Just wanted to let you know that I nominated you for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award.http://thelissachronicles.wordpress.com/2013/03/18/very-inspiring-blogger-award/
Thank you so much!! I’ll be sure to follow up on the rules as soon as I can! I really appreciate the nomination. 🙂
Firslty… cool hand luke? Thanks for the mental image of a young paul newman, God he looked hot in black and white! Secondly, confrontation is impossible for me. I usually try to use humour to avoid tension. My Grandma used to say “many a truth is said in jest”. I think I am better these days at letting people know how I feel, but I always try to get them to smile afterwards!
I do the same thing. I never want it to end on a bad note!
It depends, sometimes I confront it head on, other times I let it slide and just make a mental note. It depends on my mood and the situation that needs dealing with (or ignoring) as the case may be.
Good point. Sometimes it’s better to just walk away.
It is, although I have to say that sometimes that is difficult to do, sometimes my mouth utters words before my brain has thought about the content.
I’ve had that problem as well.