“The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi
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There have been many quotes I have used to begin posts on this blog but none have had as much of an impact on me as this very powerful string of words.
I lead a very fortunate life. I may not be rich in terms of dollars and cents but I am wealthy. I have roof over my head, a job that I love and I am surrounded by a wonderful network of friends and family who are nurturing, loving and supportive. Perhaps that energy is the fuel that brought me to this moment in my life, the moment when I realized I wanted to give more of my time to people who could use a hand and in a way I felt I was best able to help.
There is no set of standards for helping others. There is no rule book, no guideline and no complex set of algorithms. It is a simple equation. Time + Effort = Results. And for some, the results of our time and effort can make more of a difference than we will ever potentially realize.
A small group of people, including myself, spent a little over two hours of our time a week ago Sunday and the outcome of our concerted efforts will provide dinners for deserving families in our community. It was two hours out of our Sunday. We chatted, we had cocktails and we laughed. And in that small window of time, we made a huge difference. We created meals that will allow people to, not just feed their family during a tough time but, feed their family a home-cooked meal made with real food. And next Sunday, and maybe every Sunday this winter, we will do the same thing again with some familiar and some new faces and, hopefully, take another small amount of weight from the shoulders of the families we are trying to help.
If I can subsequently find myself while losing myself in the service of others, point my compass in that direction any time. I go to bed with a tired body, but with a full heart. And if my journey has taught me anything, it is that life is not defined by what you have. Life is defined by what you give.
Category Archives: life
Stuart Smalley said it best
4 CommentsMost of us are hyper-critical of ourselves. I am certainly guilty of that crime. We are truly our own worst enemy. We over-analyse the most minute details about ourselves and never give a second thought to the perception that others may have of us – a perception that may be the polar opposite of how we see ourselves but much closer to the truth.
We have become a society of comparison. We gauge our success, or perceived failure, by how we think we measure up to those around us. We judge ourselves by their opinion and not by the standards we set for ourselves. What we fail to take into consideration is the amount of effort we put into each day by just being ourselves and how difficult that journey can be. It takes a person with a strong moral compass and courage of conviction to follow the direction in which they feel will allow them to be the most comfortable and to genuinely be themselves.
Too often we allow our actions and our decisions to be swayed by outside forces. We ignore that little voice inside our head and we succumb to the white noise around us that berates us for those actions. But that initial behavior represents our true self. Those nuances of our personality are what set us apart from every other person on this planet. Those are the things worth cherishing. Those subtleties are the little details that friends and family will hold onto long after you have left this Earth for your next journey.
It would be easy to conform into a stereotype that you feel would be welcomed by society, to make decisions that would be accepted by the masses, but you would be doing yourself a disservice if those choices were not right for you. Hold true to the things that make you who you are and know that the important people in your life appreciate the choices that you make. We all need a little daily affirmation – because you are good enough, you are smart enough, and, doggone it, people like you!
Be the change you wish to see in the world
Leave a commentI never used to be one who could sit and watch the news on television and that habit has not drastically changed over the years. I have not ignored the reality of what is happening in the world. I have merely chosen to moderate how much negative energy I will allow inside the walls of my home. And with the most recent barrage of cynicism and hostility that has been taking centre screen on every news feed across the world, I choose, for the most part, to tune it out.
Don’t misunderstand me….I will still have a modicum of knowledge when it comes to current events, but I cannot subject myself to hearing the same stories told by a select number of news anchors who beat the same dead horse over and over again. Instead, I choose to take my positive energy and inject it back into my reality.
There is some debate as to whether or not it was Mahatma Gandhi who quoted the subject line of this post but, regardless of its origin, it holds a strong place in my resolve to make a difference, if not in the world as a whole, at least in my world. And with so much hate bubbling to the surface in the current political climates, I have resolved to love what matters.
If I think of myself as a fraction of the population of the planet, I am an infinitesimal part of the equation. But if I simply see myself as a fraction of my community, my significance becomes notably more meaningful. Perhaps I cannot make a difference on a global scale but I can certainly try to make a difference within the boundaries of my geography and that is what I am trying to do.
The world can only be changed by example, not by opinion. And now, more than ever, the world really needs us to be the change we wish to see.
Drawing a line in the sand
1 CommentI never used to take sides. I despised confrontation….I still do. But I was so afraid to voice an opinion for fear of a negative reaction that I would exhaust myself creating an argument for both perspectives. Oh, how I have grown.
Perhaps my uneasiness came from wanting to keep the peace. But, thankfully, I have come to value my opinion and I have developed enough of a level of comfort in my beliefs to be able to assiduously express those opinions.
I will now take a side. I will vehemently argue for a position that I feel has merit. I truly believe that my point of view has a validity that is worth arguing, and I now have the courage to present the grounds for my debate.
I don’t know when this inner strength became apparent. And although I still deplore any form of negative encounter, I am more than willing to stand my ground and speak up for the things I believe to be important. My integrity defines me. My convictions embody the person I choose to personify and my willingness to defend my argument solidifies the confidence I have in myself.
I have chosen my side. I have drawn my line. And I will defend it with confidence and pride.
Let’s talk about something hopeful for a change…..
4 CommentsAfter all of the negative posts, press, photos, social media, flyers, riots…..I can’t stand it any more. There is still so much good out there, laying in wait, hoping it feels safe enough to come out and be the captain of the ship in this swelling sea of anger. But I didn’t want to wait for that to happen. I needed positive energy back in my life….so I took the helm of the tiny ship I knew I could control and pointed it towards the water I knew would be still and serene.
My crazy eleventh grade teacher used to ramble on about something to do with the law of cause and effect, you get back what you give. I prefer its more poetic version “the ethic of reciprocity”. Either way, both ideas embody the notion that you do get what you give. Doing unto others is not just a lesson we learn as a child. Doing unto others should be stamped into our DNA. Doing unto others should be as commonplace as breathing. But sadly, it’s not.
I have been so eager to use my time in the best way possible, to make a difference to those who may need a hand during the months that our small town economy hibernates. Too many families who thrive in the summer feel the pinch as they stretch their Employment Insurance dollars to attempt to fill the space where their full paycheques used to reside. It is a sad reality, but a reality nonetheless.
I haven’t coined the proper name yet, the words elude me, but the idea is a good one and today I learned that many others understand what I am trying to do and support my idea. I want to continue making Crockpot Freezer meals for families who could use a hand. By providing them with what is basically a home-cooked meal, I’m hoping they feel the support of their community. And that community, and even the communities outside of our tiny geographical location, spoke loud and clear that they are on board. In less than 24 hours of posting a Go Fund Me account, I received $1,000.00 in donations which will make about 6o meals, 60 meals made with chicken, beef, pork, potatoes and vegetables, that will serve 4 to 5 people each and allow for leftovers.
In the angry sea I noticed a tiny light on the shore and, as I got closer, I realized there was an army on that shore. And when this angry storm finally settles, I hope everyone is able to see that light and know that their army is waiting.
We the people….
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We the people – three words at the beginning of a document meant to bring together and not divide a nation.
As a Canadian, I have felt the need to hold my tongue about what has recently happened south of our border. It is not my place to make judgement since I do not live in that country and I did not cast a vote in their election. But what happens in the United States affects me, not as a citizen but, as a human being.
What is currently taking place in a country that is my neighbour, that is home to many of my friends and some of my family, is unsettling. I am not writing this blog post with any political view in mind. My beliefs bear no consequence on the words that I am about to write. I am simply afraid that a door has been opened that may require many years to close again.
I am friends with some who support Trump and I am friends with some who support Clinton. Their choices are none of my business and the least of my concerns. My worries stem from the divide that has now been created, and that gash in humanity has allowed hatred and idiocy to bubble through its fissure of common sense.
Regardless of the outcome of the recent election, we are all still members of the human race. We have made leaps and bounds over the years to become a diverse and accepting population but lately it seems the masses are not listening to understand, they are merely listening to reply and have their own voices heard above the crowd.
My heart weighs heavy in my chest tonight and my brain is riddled with concern. Where does our collective society go from here? Will it one day wake up from its hangover, shake it off and say “What were we thinking”? Or is this the beginning of a binge….a need to test the limits of humanity to see how much it can get away with before justice finally catches up with it?
We, the people, may not all live inside of the borders of the “united” states. But we, the people, at least the people I have in my circle of friends, live as equal members of the human race and are very simply seeking liberty and justice for all.
Thyme and time again…
2 CommentsIt is a painfully contradictory reality in my mind, but this is truly my favorite time of the year. Sure, the leaves are gone and the landscape is a gloomy blend of brown and grey. It’s depressing. And sure, the clock has slipped backwards by sixty minutes and it gets dark at 5:00 pm. That’s disheartening as well. But I have to look at the bright light that now greets me in the morning when I wake up at 6:00 am and think of all of the good things that happen in my life this time of year.
When the doors of the lodge close for the season and the work clock slows to a turtle pace, my life clock has the freedom to pick up its momentum and I have much more spare time to spend doing things for others.
There is something inherently fulfilling about being able to give my time and my skills to causes that have taken up residence in my heart. Last winter was the first of hopefully many that groups of locals gathered to make freezer crockpot meals for a family who lost their home to fire while in the hospital delivering twins. We banded together, gave our Thyme and our time, and filled their freezer with a few months worth of meals. So many of the group commented on how wonderful they felt being able to help.
And this year will be the fourth year I have organized a Toy Drive for the local children. To say the response has been incredible would be an egregious understatement. My heart swells so much when the time comes to pack up the toys for delivery that I am overwhelmed by emotion.
I had always looked at volunteers in silent awe. I knew they must feel some reward to give their time, their generosity or even just their smile or a touch of their hand to help someone’s day become a little brighter, but I had no idea how truly euphoric the feeling was until I began giving my time. And now that I have had a taste of that….I will always want more. If you have never had the chance to do any volunteer work and the opportunity presents itself to put up your hand to help, in any way, I promise you won’t regret it!
Into the Mystic
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Faint whispers.
Rustling leaves.
Movements in the bush.
As I strain to hear them,
I know they long to be seen,
if only for just a moment.
They are the ghosts of my past,
the purveyors of my future,
and the keepers of my secrets.
They linger in the spaces
between shadow and light.
Their consciousness
meets my curiosity,
and I strain to see their light
in my twilight vision.
Their dance
is my celebration.
Their presence
is my comfort.
They seek my truth.
They are my warriors, my army,
and they will always
be the reason I smile in my sleep.
When you just have to listen to show tunes…..
8 Comments“What greater thing is there for human souls than to feel that they are joined for life, to be with each other in silent unspeakable memories.” George Elliott
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Some moments sneak up on us, catching us completely off-guard while other moments just slap us in the face. The hand print is still on my cheek from my experience this afternoon.
We were being bombarded by the first snowfall of the season. It was in our forecast so it was no surprise. What was a shock was my immediate thought to call my mother and tell her to stay indoors today. I was driving home from work and, without hesitation, was reaching for my speed dial to call her number when I realized what I was doing…..and then the tears came. My mother passed away in March of 2014. Even though I was a mere 1/2 kilometre from my house, I had to pull over at the end of my road to collect myself.
I have felt my mom’s presence quite a bit lately, and so has my brother. He actually admitted to me that he was listening to the Cabaret soundtrack at work (sorry, Jamie) and I know that was my mother’s doing. Cabaret was one of her favorites, and although my brother didn’t spend the countless hours my mom and I did watching old musicals, the nostalgia of the music was not lost on him.
I never doubt that my mother will always be here when we need her. As I took a break from writing this post, she prodded me once again in her subtle way. A duet with Barbra Streisand and Barry Gibb magically appeared on my news feed on Facebook and it was one of my mom’s favorite Barbra songs. “What Kind of Fool” doesn’t believe that messages can be sent from those who have passed?
She is here….inserting herself into the moments that she feels she is needed. Her mother-instinct is still alive and well and she knows, perhaps better than we do, that she can still help guide us through those moments when only a mom can say or do the right thing. And, once again, she is correct. I do need her now…..and maybe my brother does as well. And even if my worries are not about me, her presence and her calming influence are making me feel like everything is going to be ‘real fine’.
Getting the green light
6 CommentsThe lodge where I am employed is closed for the season, our quaint little village resembles more of a ghost town with a few tumbleweeds rolling down the main street and the silence at night can be deafening.
But in these times of serenity, behind the doors of seemingly empty kitchens, a group of women and men are readying themselves to wield sharp knives and give even Gordon Ramsay a run for his money in the chopping department!
Our small group of devoted volunteers meet for a couple of hours over a couple of weekends to create crockpot freezer meals to help a few families who may be struggling, for whatever reason. Last year, it was a young family who had lost their home in a fire just after delivering twins. This year we are doing our best to spread the meals to a few families and not just one.
There have been a few hurdles along the track to finding these families but the ribbon at the finish line is getting to be within striking distance. Although the meals are being prepared in an inspected and certified kitchen, many of the choppers have not taken a food safety course, so there was a question as to whether the food bank was going to be allowed to accept our donations.
The joy of living in a small town is that you can literally ask your neighbors if they know of any families who could benefit from our knife skills and they will immediately give you a list of names. And I have recently discovered that, as long as the meals are labelled with all ingredients (which they are), the food bank will give us that long awaited green light and accept the meals – so the only thing left to do is shop and chop!
polysyllabic profundities 